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  • book



    This topic contains 24 replies, has 0 voices, and was last updated by Profile photo of Rattleoid Rattleoid 15 years, 6 months ago.

    Viewing 11 posts - 16 through 26 (of 26 total)
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    • #388481
      Profile photo of Rattleoid
      Rattleoid
      Member

      Here is the first chapter, still needs some work. But there is more to come To Be Named By: Colin(Rattleoid) Chapter 1:Darkness Devin fell onto millions of glass shards and screamed in pain as an enormous build up of pressure fell upon his legs. It was all over. He knew that. He knew all his friends were most likely dead and he watched hopelessly as his tormentor prepared to finish him off. Devin sat in math class bored out of his mind he knew all this stuff, he was at the top of his class, but had to do all the reviews and worksheets everyone else did. So he spent most of class wishing that something would happen to get him out of class. Just then the bell rang, it was three o’clock and school was over for the day. Devin was, for the most part, an average kid. He had black hair that he kept short and spiky, he was a bit tall for his age of thirteen, and he was very thin. He lived in Evergreen Park, Illinois and went to central junior high. Devin rushed out of school and headed to the park where he had plans to meet his friends Terry and Roy, Terry was short had straight short blond hair, was thirteen and was also very thin while Roy was average height had black curly hair and was fourteen. Just as Devin saw and began to run toward them It happened. The ground began to shake and enormous crevices began to appear in the ground and thousands of dark spheres flooded out into the sky blocking out the sun, the clouds and everything else in the sky. Unfortunately, they didn’t all head to the sky, some formed into a kind of humanoid shape and began to attack the people and the things surrounding them. Everyone began to flee , Devin and his friends ran hoping they could find shelter. But the creatures were extraordinarily fast. Luckily they were able to get to Pappy’s, a local fast food restaurant, and hid behind the counter. They were left with many questions in their heads, what was happening and what could be done to stop it.So, any questions or comments?EDIT-Come on, nothing?

      #389868
      Profile photo of Admin
      Admin
      Keymaster

      Great beginning, can't wait for the rest.

      #389873
      Profile photo of clonetos
      clonetos
      Member

      hmmm nope no bakugan here i can be assured this is now 100% clone approved!

      #389938
      Profile photo of ultra dragonoid
      Fullmetal
      Member

      this might sound stupid, but it would be COOL if some of the BB members could be in it. sorry, BB has taken over my life. i might even quit. WHO WANTS AN ACCOUNT!!

      #389958
      Profile photo of Rattleoid
      Rattleoid
      Member

      this might sound stupid, but it would be COOL if some of the BB members could be in it. sorry, BB has taken over my life. i might even quit. WHO WANTS AN ACCOUNT!!

      Well, I wan't to have real names in it. And I wrote the beginning last year, then I found it a few weeks ago and continued it. Plus the three main characters are based off my real friends but with the names we use as "Gamer Tags". I, Colin, am obviosly Devin, The main character, My friend Eric is Terry and my cousin Reagan is Roy.

      #389972

      this is some advice. when you write a book, you dont start the adventure immediatly in the first chapter. you want to go on about his life for about 5 chapters and did you start the adventure. and at the beginning of chapter 1 about the tormentor, put that before chapter one in the prolog. thats my advice, i hope it helps

      #389976
      Profile photo of Rattleoid
      Rattleoid
      Member

      this is some advice. when you write a book, you dont start the adventure immediatly in the first chapter. you want to go on about his life for about 5 chapters and did you start the adventure. and at the beginning of chapter 1 about the tormentor, put that before chapter one in the prolog. thats my advice, i hope it helps

      Have you ever read the Percy Jackson and the Olympians series, it gets right in the action from the first two three paragraphs, and I've always hated books with long openings. But I am going to lengthen the beginning a bit.Ugh I keep getting writers block!

      #390679
      Profile photo of Nightmare
      Nightmare
      Member

      well, i thik its pretty kool. im writing a book too but it has bakugan in it(before people start spamming, yes i will put in fanfic!)you actualy gave me a few ideas.for help-think about the ending,put a surprising twist in itin my book, 6 bakugan find out that they are actualy the 6 main caracters that were turned into bakugan when coming from the future. 😀

      #390683
      Profile photo of Rattleoid
      Rattleoid
      Member

      well, i thik its pretty kool. im writing a book too but it has bakugan in it(before people start spamming, yes i will put in fanfic!)you actualy gave me a few ideas.for help-think about the ending,put a surprising twist in itin my book, 6 bakugan find out that they are actualy the 6 main caracters that were turned into bakugan when coming from the future. 😀

      I already have an ending, and it is going to be a series.

      #390716
      Profile photo of Maping
      Maping
      Member

      this is some advice. when you write a book, you dont start the adventure immediatly in the first chapter. you want to go on about his life for about 5 chapters and did you start the adventure. and at the beginning of chapter 1 about the tormentor, put that before chapter one in the prolog. thats my advice, i hope it helps

      Here's some advice. When giving advice, USE SPELLING AND GRAMMAR.

      #390722
      Profile photo of Admin
      Admin
      Keymaster

      Yea, you need to pre read before you post. Make sure it's readable.

    Viewing 11 posts - 16 through 26 (of 26 total)

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